Well, I don't know where to begin...

I met a man about a year ago...and since my life has forever been changed. He came to town on business and I was skeptical to meet him. We had chatted briefly on a dating site at a point in my life when I was about to give up on love all together. But, as I had agreed, I met him for dinner. The moment we met and I looked into his eyes and saw his smile...my heart completely opened. He was shy and a bit pretentious. It was obvious he craved love and tenderness, but withdrawn from fear of being hurt by someone in the past, just as I have been. After dinner he walked me to my car, and under what we thought was a bright street lamp, we smiled and kissed goodnight. The kiss was tender, sweet, and gentle. I had be flirting with him all evening and after the first kiss told him it wasn't necessary for him to be shy with me. So, he kissed me again, but this time it was even more amazing. Later, after I got home from dinner, I sat in my room and happened to gaze out the window. The moon was full and bright and I sat there thinking of him. A few months later a friend sent me an article detailing that that night the moon was the fullest it would ever be of that year.

Well, the days moved on and he and I saw each other again and again. Finally, it came time for him to go back home. I didn't want him to go. I didn't want him to ever go...not from me. But, when the time came, I drove him to the airport. I hugged and kissed him with tears in my eyes. Without thought I whispered "I love you" in his ear. I hadn't realized what I had said until I had heard it myself. I couldn't believe I had said it...but knew in my heart I truly meant it. We looked into each other's teary eyes and hugged and kissed again.

We kept in contact and even saw each other a couple more times. Each time it got harder...knowing we lived so far from each other that we wouldn't be able to see each other as often as we wanted. All I wanted was to be with him...to feel more than I had ever felt with anyone...to dare to love again.

Over time, he began to withdraw and I didn't know what to do. I knew the distance was killing him, just as it was me. It seemed that there were continuous work and family obligations to contend with that monopolized our time. Eventually, he stopped corresponding with me.

Ever since him, I've not really been able to allow myself to open my heart to anyone, to love again.

I just wonder...if he's the one. If he is...I wish I knew what it would take to bring us back together again.

If only...someone knew.

Mary, 9/29/xx, 10:30AM, Ohio
Steve, 6/11/xx, unknown, Utah

Hello Dear Mary,

Thank you for your heart-touching and eloquently written story and question. I'm sorry for your heartbreak, dear one, and hope you will find joy in knowing one day how special this relationship really was for your growth and expansion.

I feel you have had a lot of pain in the past that you haven't yet healed from, and trust is a major issue you have been facing, along with a sense of isolation and burdens that you've taken upon yourself. I feel you will soon have a breakthrough, and are in the process of "seeing beyond the illusion". This is a time of transformation for you on many levels, you'll be reflecting on what is important to you, and what must be released for greater gifts to be received.

Steve entered your life to show you your capacity for love, you have much love to give and to receive, but must now still your mind and work alone to heal your past wounds. Steve may have also sparked a renewed interest in your creativity, a blossoming of your hidden talents and desires... run with it!

Without Steve's birthtime, I cannot formulate an accurate astrological assessment of the relationship, but with his Gemini sun sign, I'm sure he has been facing much difficulty in these past 2 years that will soon be coming to an end after Saturn moves from his sign in June. Intuitively, I feel that there has been something hidden... something he has been ashamed to tell you or has not been truthful about, perhaps even to himself. It also feels like there is grief and sorrow, and that he's currently tied in obligations that have put his life on hold.

Often, it's after we've loved and lost a soulmate that we've felt was "the one", that we are rewarded with a even greater love. I feel this is the case with Steve. In knowing him, you've learned to love deeply, to have the courage once again to open to love. You're challenged to see how worthy you are of love now, and be ready to receive. I feel another man will enter your life by summer of next year... I know it seems like a long time off, but don't despair! I'm sure you know that meeting "the one" is well worth the wait, your joy will be sweeter after this sorrow you've endured. Now whether this new man is someone you haven't yet met, or if it's Steve once again after a major transformation and healing, I don't know. But I do feel that this will be your greatest love and life partner. You can still hold Steve in your loving thoughts... and release him without expectation, this is truly loving unconditionally, and the reward of loving unconditionally is in developing a greater capacity for receiving this love in return.

Be strong and patient dear Mary, I know you already have been.
Thank you for allowing me to read for you, I hope I have helped.

Blessings of strength, love & light,
Soul2Harusami

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