Dear
Katalina,
Greetings
and welcome to Soul2Soul!
I can
understand your confusion. The situation is quite complex and you
are brave to even be contemplating a journey to another country.
It feels
as though things are very unsettled around you at the moment. I
get a feeling of distress and upheaval, also a sense of 'noise'.
This may be too many people trying to tell you their opinions or
your own inner confusion. In any case, it does not feel like you
are in a good place right now to make decisions.
There
is a great feeling of frustrated energy... I'd advise you to take
some time out from the world first. Retreat to a quiet place, somewhere
where you can allow things around you to get calmer. You do not
have to make a choice right away... choices this are best undertaken
in a state of clarity or inner peace.
I have
very mixed feelings about your question and this relationship. I
believe both of you are sincere in your feelings now, and a wish
to be together, however, this love feels very idealistic. I don't
believe you fully know yourselves or each other. It feels as though
you are projecting quite a lot the image of an ideal past, future
and partner onto the other.
Please
remember, love is only the first step. It is not a guarantee or
a cure-all. Loving someone does not mean you will necessarily be
happy with them. It doesn't mean you can make each other happy.
Even
if you consider someone a soulmate, and feel you have known each
other through past lives, it doesn't always mean those karmic links
are positive ones.
In your
relationship with M. I feel harmony in the short term, but in the
long term things are likely to deteriorate. I believe the promises
he is making are sincere, but not entirely realistic. This man is
a complicated character and something of a dreamer/idealist, prone
to seeking out women who do not exist.
It feels
as though he is a very charming person, who can be warm and generous
as well as vain and shallow.
Another
concern I have is that the dynamics will be uneven. If you go to
Hungary, you are moving to his home country, away from your home,
your friends, things you are used to. You will need to start over
and will probably need to rely very much on M. (at least initially)
to get your footing. It sounds as though his life there is sorted
out and settled, while yours would be newborn... which in itself
carries a measure of stress, insecurity and inequality.
The question
of whether someone loves you and whether they can make you happy
are very different. One does not guarantee the other. Love and promises
of change are simply the first step. They do not always lead to
actual change.
Career-wise,
I believe you will be able to make a career in whichever country
you are in. You seem to have both talent and drive, the only two
truly necessary components. Your knowledge of Hungarian may be an
obstacle, if you do not speak it already and still intend to try
and make a life there I'd suggest becoming fluent ASAP.
There
is no simple answer to your question. I still feel quite a lot of
stubbornness and unrest around you...it may be best to not make
a choice until you are in a calm place. Let the noise subside. Ultimately,
regardless of what any of us believe is in your best interests,
what do you want?
If you
do decide to move to Hungary, be prepared for the many obstacles
and challenges you would face. My feeling is that your relationship
with M. will not be an easy one, no matter how long it lasts. I
think one or both of you are to some degree trying to create a fairy
tale. Fairy tales are an illusion. There is no such thing as a 'perfect'
partner.
I don't
think M. is an entirely reliable man no matter how genuine his intentions
may seem at the time. He simply does not feel realistic. If you
were to go to Hungary, my feeling is that you would be doing a lot
more emotional work in the relationship than he would.
If you
choose to pursue it, a new life overseas is an adventure, with all
its uncertainties and dangers. It feels as though most of you is
yearning to go, but please keep in mind that no life you build in
Hungary will be without hardship.
Furthermore,
your relationship with M. is likely to transform as you change.
You feel very drawn to this man and quite enchanted by him... as
I said he seems a very charming person. Relationships fluctuate
as people change. Frequently they are a dance of distancing and
reconnection. Even though you have doubts about his character it
also feels as though you carry quite a lot of leftover affection
from the past for this man.
Of the
two of you I'd say he is more flamboyant and demonstrative while
you are more sensible and stable. Despite being younger it feels
like you are more mature. I feel as though part of you is dissatisfied
with your life in Australia while at the same time you are hesitant
but yearning to go.
Be cautious
though. Your relationship with him is likely to carry quite a measure
of frustration and heartache. Sometimes though, even though we have
our suspicions about the final destination the journey is still
worth it. It is up to you whether you think it is or not.
I wish
you the best of luck with whatever you decide.
Please let us know how you get on.
Many
blessings on your journey,
Soul2Moon
