Hi there,

My question is in regards to my husband of one year. I love him very dearly, but I can never be sure that he feels the same way about me. He is very much a 'non-physical' person, I think as a result of both his upbringing (his family seems very cold in terms of showing physical affection as well) and past hurts. I also find it very disconcerting (please excuse me being blatant here) that he has no interest in sex with me. He told me from the start that 'sex isn't a big thing' for him, but I would love to feel that he can find me sexy and attractive. I don't know how to overcome this and put a little more passion into our marriage. If you are able to share some insights into this situation I would really appreciate it. His name is Frederic (known as Rick), born 11 June xxxx, France. My name is Carolyn, born Jan 6, xxxx, in Australia I will wait with fingers crossed to see if I am the lucky one!

Regards
Carolyn

 

Hello Carolyn,

First, I must tell you I was a bit biased in answering your email.... we happen to share a birthdate dear fellow cappy!

I want to explain that I do a combination of things to arrive at an unbiased message concerning your question, a mixture of tarot, astrology and listening to my heart.... Intuition, all this after a prayer to Spirit to be the conduit needed to give you what you need at this time.

I feel that you are starting to see some cracks in the illusion after a year of marriage... there is still a great deal of comfort there... abundance even on the material side of things, and with it a bit of complacency... not really wanting to make waves. This relationship for you, was an act of trust... trusting in the promise of a happily ever after. But you are now at a stage of wanting to feel life more fully... there is a ripeness in you, a luscious fruit ready to be picked and yet scared of rotting on the vine. Your fighting your natural impulses in order to do the "right thing" while feeling quite isolated emotionally. It's as if you are waiting for a change yet know it will not come... and there is a feeling of you life being "on hold". There are morality issues involved, his or yours, and a very conservative nature, coldness is indicated even in the cards, and your feelings of "ice-olation" manifests here. Your eyes are beginning to clear and you'll be seeing this relationship in a new light, a rebirth is indicated, which could also mean the end of something.... hopefully the end of your isolation and normal healthy hunger for human touch.

I feel you and Rick are working out karmic issues from lives past, 12th house activity, the Moon in the 12th is a difficult position, lots of work to do and honest communications necessary for the relationship to flourish at all. I feel Rick is holding secrets, secrets that are affecting your relationship and secrets only he will know when and how to deal with, hopefully with the help of a professional counselor. There is definitely a lot of love between you, but this will never be an "easy" relationship, there is a lot of problems I see with emotional interactions between you, and affection will not be forthcoming from him anytime soon. My suggestion to you is to truly know in your heart what YOU want.... and what you can live without, can you live a life devoid of passion? Truly know what is important to you. There are no mistakes in life, only choices and experiences, but don't let your husband's lack of desire affect your vision of yourself as a sexy, vibrant woman. Do not compromise your own hearts deep desires for the sake of comfort. Open the lines of communication between you and tell him your needs and see if he'll agree to counseling, if not, (and tell me if I'm wrong, but I feel a bit of a hard-headedness here also...) I would think about weighing your desires and his reluctance and following your heart... I once read that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want to be loved, doesn't mean they're not loving you the best that they can.... it's true... but sometimes a person's best is just not enough, and there's nothing wrong with that. In my own life, my ex and I are like brother and sister, there was love there, but not the kind to sustain a marriage...

Hope this has been of some help, thank you for allowing me to read for you.

Best wishes to you {{{{Carolyn}}}}
Love & light,
Soul2Harusami

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